It's official

So sad, my baby days are over. Today I took the trip to Stride Rite to get my daughter her first pair of SHOES. About three days ago my daughter decided that walking was much better than crawling. She is walking 90% of the time so it was time to invest in a good pair of sturdy starter shoes.

Here they are in all their glory; size 4 1/2, white, adorable, sandels. Right out of the box, full of possibilities but to me they just make me want to cry.
















We have entered toddlerhood. I now have a toddler and a preschooler. Yes, pity me! Craziness, chaos and calamity makes up what once was a happy, quiet, and well-rested home. We are still a happy home but quiet and well rested well..not so much.

YOUR AMERICAN IDOL IS......TAYLOR "Soul Patrol" HICKS

63.4 million votes and I was not one of them. I tried for 3 hours about 50 times but could not get through!!

OMG I am so friggin exited. I will have a drink for Taylor because as Holli says "I am a Goober."

I adore Taylor he is talented, and I believe deserved to win!! Ok...patting myself but he was one of my faves

OK...it was cool that Chris sang with Live. I love that Carrie Underwood sang I love Elliott singing U2 with Mary J. Blige that rocked! But what the hell man this is a big venue; you would think they could get some bigger names.

They dusted off Dionne Warwick, Meatloaf and Prince! I was falling asleep. I even really really hated the montage of Idol concert songs. Zzzzz....

And..what the hell was going on with the whole Meatloaf thing...man that truly sucked.

Wolfgang Puck and Ditzy Kelli..who the hell came up with that?

The whole Clay thing with that crazy weirdo dude..what the heck!? I need to see it again, because I want to see when they officially shut off his mic. Did he really think that we were going to watch him do a whole song? That was really funny!

I am so happy you would think I gave birth to Taylor myself.

I am so excited for tonight!! Damn I need a friggin life

It really could be either one of them but I think Taylor is so entertaining. I know a lot of people are turned off by the whole "soul patrol" thing, the dancing, the head and hand gestures but I have to say that is what I love about him. He is a really good singer and you can tell how much he loves singing. He knows who he is and loves what he does.








Kat, is stunningly beautiful and can truly sing. I think she is still trying to find herself and her style. Does she want to do Pop, Top 40, Easy Listening? Is she Joss Stone or Celine. Is she barefoot and on her knees or in a gown trying to be graceful? I don't know and neither does she. Once she finds her own style and decides what direction she wants she is going to be amazing!

Whose it going to be...Kat or Taylor???

Tonight Katherine and Taylor each sang three songs.

Kat sang Black Horse and Cherry Tree, Somewhere over the Rainbow and her new single My Destiny.

Taylor sang Living for the City, Levon, and his single Do I make you Cry.

According to the judges...Taylor took the first round, Kat took second and as for Simon...Taylor took IDOL!!!

I have to say that Kat sounded great on Somewhere.. but as for her single. I thought it was boring, flat, pitchy, and unclimatic. Blakkkk...

Taylor was awesome on Living for the City, he was ok on Levon and he was ok on Do...

My vote...TAYLOR TO WIN

Bye Bye Elliott

So last night Elliott Yamin was sent home. It was a little sad I must say.
Tears were flowing from Paula, Elliott and his mom.

The votes were so close that as they started the build up to let us know who was leaving I started thinking it could be either of them...

Bye Elliott, you are sweet, talented and a good person.

American Idol - Top 3

Tonight the contestants will sing 3 songs each. The first chosen by Clive, the second by a judge, the third is contestant's choice.

Before I get into songs....what the hell is up with Paula. She is one crazy chick! Fallening all over Simon, talking about double sided tape, glassy eyes, etc...weirdo

Elliott started with Open Arms by Journey. Elliott sounded awesome. Love the smooth, smokey effortless sound of his voice.

Side note: My cousin is the lead singer in a Journey cover band "Seperate Ways". Check it out if you have a chance. You won't find anyone who sounds closer to Steve Perry than Danny!

Oh yeah...back to Idol

Randy - Little problem in the chorus but you worked it out
Paula - Excellent voice tonight. Great job
Simon - Great choice, not great a little stiff

Kat's first song was R. Kelly's I Believe I can fly. I love the song, she looks incredible but I thought it wasn't great. She does too many runs. Just sing honey. No reason to go overboard.

Randy - Not the right thing for you
Paula - You look amazing
Simon - Apart from some bum notes you created a moment for yourself.

Taylor's first song was Dancing in the Dark by Brrruuuucceeee. I can't wait for Taylor to sing. I love Taylor. He sounded great to me and I knew he would.

Randy - You know how to have a good time
Paula - ??? she said - Something about double sided tape
Simon - It was Ok!!

Paula chose What you Won't do for love for Elliott. Love the shirt. He sounds good but it was just ok for me.

Randy - Not best performance
Paula - Amazing soul and R & B sound
Simon - Not best song. Style suited you. I thought you sounded pretty good.

Simon chose Somewhere Over the Rainbow for Kat. There she is on the floor again. I love people who can sing acapella. She looks amazing. She fortunately kept the runs to a minimum. It was a great vocal.

Randy - Best vocal of the season for you
Paula - You sounded great and you didn't go overboard
Simon - Very happy for you. Best performance of the season

Randy chose You are so Beautiful for Taylor. I was hoping for some Bob Seegar but Joe Cocker is cool. He of course sounded great.

Randy - Great tender moment
Paula - Not only do you look like a star. You are a star
Simon - Far away your best performance

Elliott is singing I believe to my Soul by Ray Charles. He sounded nasally to me. I didn't love it.

Randy - You can sing. Good job.
Paula - No one can sing songs like that
Simon - Not going to carry you through to the next week.

Kat chose I ain't got nothing but the Blues. It was ok! Would have liked something a bit more contemporary.

Randy - It was ok
Paula - Your magic was Over the Rainbow. Great job
Simon - Overall good night I just wish you could have ended up with the middle song

Taylor chose Try a little Tenderness by Otis Redding. Is there nothing this cat can't do. Soul Patrol Baby! Soul Pa-trol!! He is good no matter what.

Randy - I have a new name for you, "Have a good time funky Taylor"
Paula - You did an incredible job
Simon - Smart choices, hideous ending.

If I was voting...uh, this is hard...they are all pretty good...but I would vote for Taylor.

My choice to leave...Elliott

Happy Birthday Big Baby Boy!

I am two days late but I wanted to say that I want to wish you a very Happy Birthday Baby. We already celebrated your birthday, I have already written in your Love Letter Book.




















Waiting to open presents. Love the candle! It gets lit every year until his 21st birthday.











The cake has been eaten and the gifts played with but I really just want to let you know just how much I love you sweetie. You and your little muppet face make my heart smile. I love watching, listening to you and playing with you. You are so much fun and so funny. You also have the uncanny ability to make me absolutely crazy.





Handsome loves the Happy Birthday song













Lately you have taken to whining instead of talking and throwing all kinds of tantrums to get your way and that is something I am running out of patience for. Mommy and Daddy are really good about trying to hear you out or deflecting the situation but lately it has gotten a bit difficult. You like watching us get crazy and running out of patience! You look that power don't you little man?!

Beside that...you are so cute, funny and always make us laugh. We both want to be the one you ask for when you are hurt, or want to go to bed. When you give unsolicited hugs or kisses, I swear that you could take sole responsibility for world peace, if only everyone had a little Handsome in their life!






























Here he is opening gifts of my Aussie friends.
He got a Wiggle kite, Dorothy the dinosaur beanie and a Jeff shirt. Funny because we got him Anthony and Murphy shirts. Now he just needs Greg's shirt and we are Wiggled out! World's apart and we think the same.




After opening some gifts he needed a milk break



Then he opened some gifts from Tia in California..he got a Wiggle Dance Mat and Magnetic activity boards. So cool!


Ten things I love about you:

I love that you hug and kiss your sister and ask for her when she is napping.
I love that you laugh hysterically while watching America's Funniest Videos. That's my boy!!
I love that you say, "a hug" with your arms up when I sing something you like or when you have done something that I am about to discover. You are always hugging. Most moms at the Mom and Tot group usually are telling their kids to stop hitting or pushing. Not me...I am usually saying, "Handsome stop hugging!" Some kids don't like it and it does get you pushed at least once.
I love watching you play, sing and dance. You always looks so happy!
I love that you want me to sing to you and you smile while listening. It always makes me tear up.
I love looking into your big brown eyes and seeing myself and Daddy. We did a good job. Too bad he is done making babies (we make really cute ones)
I love that you don't like soda, chips, candy, ice cream and cake (for now anyway)
I love that you love learning. I get to live one of my childhood wish jobs (to be a teacher)
I love that you play with my hair
I love how you are always so enthusiastic. You are always ready to laugh, run, play, jump, and sing.

I love everything about you baby boy.

I remembering telling everyone when you were about 2 or 3 months old that you were going to have a permanent kiss mark on your forehead because I couldn't stop kissing you. Here we are three years later and I still can't stop kissing you. You truly are my heart on legs!

I love you so much,

Love, Mommy

IDOL Walking

SHOCKED!! Dismayed??? What????
I can't believe it!




















I know I usually write Dead Idol Walking but Chris is MY idol! Damnit!




















I cannot believe it! Oh wait I already said that.
























Chris and Katherine both looked shock! She looked shocked that it wasn't her and he looked like he was waiting to wake up from a bad dream!

Ok..enough exclaimations..I am done.

Pick up the phone Chris, it's Tony Matola.

It was a tough season. Someone had to go I don't know who it should have been but I am SHOCKED!

Already?????!!!!

Jesus, where do I begin. Tomorrow at 5:48 a.m. my son will turn 3. Where did the time go.
I was sleeping on the couch May 11, 2003 3:30 a.m. I got up to get a drink and go to the bathroom because that was basically all I did. I lied back down to try to go back to sleep and my water broke. I woke my husband who had unselfishly been spending the last two months draping his 6+ foot frame on our little love seat because I couldn't sleep in the bed and had to sleep on the couch.

a couple days before Jesse's birth


















He jumped up and said, "remain calm." Too funny! What? I was totally calm that was until I noticed all the maconium that was (squeamish folks - I am Sorry) pouring out. The weirdest thing; it looked like sea weed. Well really gelatinous sea weed anyway.

Because my son was breech he was scheduled to be vacated from his warm, cozy home on the 13th, so this was really scary for me. I know that maconium means that the baby has gone to the bathroom and I also know that if they are to aspirate this crap it can be deadly.

The hospital is 45 minutes away and I just wanted to get there to hear the baby's heartbeat. My husband called the doc and handed me the phone. The doc asked if I was sure that it was meconium. I said "hell yes". Long story short....My husband who thinks on his feet calmed me down by saying that the baby was upside down which means that the meconium was no where near his face and that his bottom being so close to well..er. my bottom that was why I was seeing SO much of this tarry black crap.

When I was finally hooked up and could hear Jesse's heartbeat I was so much calmer. I was rushed into OR as an emergency cesarean. I was not part of Jesse's birth at all which really bothered me later on. The meds knocked me out. I have very little recollection of any of his birth. "Maria we are 5 minutes away from the baby. Maria we are 2 minutes away from the baby." I heard my husband say "Oh my God" twice. Then my son cried. The chair next to me where my husband was sitting is empty. Then my husband is holding a little bundle in his arms. I am being wheeled down the hall hearing "Happy Mother's Day" from the nurses as they place a plant in my arms (I still have it and it is so big). Then my husband comes in my room, it is 12: 30. He has already called everyone and he is asking me if I saw "HIM" yet? Finally you hear that cart coming down the hallway and a nurse says "someone is here to see you." I looked at him and he was so beautiful with so much hair. I say, "Hello Jesse, I am your Mommy." All I kept thinking as I unwrapped him was "I have a son. He's beautiful and perfect and he's mine."



He came out looking like a 2 month old
















There is nothing like those first few days in the hospital. It is like you are on your own little island. There is a total lovefest with you, your husband and this precious, brand new baby who has not a flaw on them, everything and anything is possible. Your life is different and you just want to be a better person because you are so in love. I loved everyone and everything when my son was born! I remember everytime I heard that cart coming down the hall every two hours for me to feed him I would sit up and say "my prince is here."

Here we are 3 years later and he is STILL my Prince. I can't believe that tomorrow my baby boy is turning 3.

More about my heart on legs tomorrow.

American Idol - Top 4 - Sing songs of the King

We got to see the Idols arrive at Graceland and are welcomed by Ms. Goth herself, Priscilla Presley. When did she become the bride of Frankenstein? She had a weird Michael Jackson vibe going. While at Graceland they worked with Tony (ex-Mariah Carey) Matola.

Taylor started the evening with of course Jail House Rock - Who didn't know Taylor would sing this when they told us last week the Idols were going to Graceland by private jet?

Taylor started singing in the audience with a way too tight suit. He shook his stuff for all it was worth. I loved the moves but I didn't love the singing. It was just ok for me but this guy is so entertaining and likeable that it is hard to say anything negative about him. Is he the American Idol? I don't think so but everyone needs a little bit of Taylor in their life. He just makes you smile.

Randy - "Wow. You were in your element. That was great".
Paula - "You look fantastic. That was phenomenal."
Simon - "In the real world that was a terrible impersonation. Karoake with a capital K".

Chris sang Suspicious Minds - Matola (how the hell do you spell this dude's name?) loved Chris's voice. Chris can friggin sing. I love this guys voice but was put off by his announcement that he wears boxer-briefs. I don't know maybe that is something I would have wanted to know when I was 14 but as a married women, knowing he is married I was sitting there wondering what his wife was thinking. I loved the song but hated the older Elvis glasses.

Randy - "Tender moment, nice but not your best".
Paula - "You forget how great the song is until you hear Chris Doughtry sing it".
Simon - "Sun glasses aside, that worked."

Elliott sang If I can dream. I know this song because my family listened to a lot of Elvis but this was not a popular song so I wasn't sure that he had made the right song choice for American. Elliott started out a little boring until the middle of the song. As Randy would say, "You brought it Dawg." Got to love Elliott. He is truly a great singer.

Randy - "You layed it out. You made it your own."
Paula - "Best vocal you have done so far this season."
Simon - "Best so far"

Katherine sang Hound Dog/Shook Up. Cute! Cute! Love the hair. Love the shirt. Love the hair flipping. She sounded pretty good but it was a bit screetchy at times.

Randy - "You had a good time but what happened in the middle?"
Paula - "Fun seeing you dance." (not sure what Paula thought of her singing since she didn't mention).
Simon - "It was like a desperate, manic audition. For me it wasn't great overall."

Second round
Taylor named dropped Lisa Marie's name while talking to Ryan like 10 times. Yeah, ok Taylor! You were at Graceland. Rest assured that the world knows you ran into Lisa Marie! Anyway..Taylor sang on of my favorite Elvis songs In the Ghetto. Man, I love this song! I didn't love the arrangement because I felt it was faster than I preferred. It is a moving song and I don't think the arrangement let you feel the worlds. Taylor was good overall.

Randy - "Right key, right song. Hot!!"
Paula - "Different side of you"
Simon - "World's apart from your first song. You just sang your way into the finals."

Chris sang A little less conversation. Matola it seems; is ready to sign Chris. "He is impressive."
Tired Chris? It sounds like it. He seemed bored up there to me but his voice of course was still great.

Randy - "Right key, that was hot!"
Paula - "I adore you and that song showed a little more personality"
Simon - "Was ok. Not as good as your first."

Elliott sang Trouble. No, no not tough Elliott! Watch out ya'll, Elliott will know your block off! Cute. It was like watching my 2 year old running around with with his fake Superman muscles yelling "roooooarrrr". This cat can sing it was just funny to me. Elliott talking smack about being "EVIL."

Randy - "Your best performance ever."
Paula - "I was wrong, this was your best performance ever."
Simon - "You came in as the underdog and you came out fighting. You deserve to go to the next roung."

Katherine sang Can't help falling in love. I don't know it was just ok for me. She looked amazing, has an amazing voice but it was not great. There were some pitch problems to me.

Randy - "Better than the first. Pitchy"
Paula - " I enjoyed seeing you move."
Simon - "Not one of your best nights. Too much! Came in at a disadvantage. The arrangement was too much."

If American listens to the judges Katherine will be going home.

For me, if I was voting, I would vote for Chris and Katherine would be leaving.

It was a hard season because there are so many great singers left. They are all so talented and I really don't think any of them need to worry about their future.

Dead Idol Walking - Princess P

Tonight we found out who the top 4 are.

Taylor - safe
Chris - safe - Duh!
Paris - bottom
Elliott - bottom
Katherine - safe

Elliott is told to sit and Paris is left standing. It is interesting to watch the montage' of Paris moments because there were tons of tears whenever someone was let go in the beginning. As we get closer to the end, I haven't seen any tears! Sup wit that yo!? Maybe I am just trying to create drama where there is none.

AI - Top 5

Tonight we listen to the Top 5 (my fave #) start with songs from the year they were born and then get a chance with a second song from today's Billboard. As depressing as it was to hear how friggin old I truly am this was a good show.

Elliott sang On Broadway - It was ok for me. I like Elliott but I didn't think it was a strong performance.
Randy thought it was a rough start
Paula though it was ok
Simon told him he was lucky he had a chance with another song tonight.

Paris sang Prince's Kiss - I like when Prince sings this song and I liked it when Paris sang it. She is a really good singer I just hate her voice when she talks. Irks me! She showed personality and added her own little bit to the song.
Randy - Liked that she had fun
Paula - Everyone knows you can sing your butt off
Simon - He told her it was screechy and annoying

Chris sang Renegade - WOW, WOW, WOW! Chris can sing!!!! I love this dudes voice. Does he ever look bad?
Randy - Liked it that was hot
Paula - You set yourself far ahead of everyone else
Simon - Better than your last performance

Katherine sang Against the Odds - I love Katherine and I thought she did great.
Randy - You look amazing
Paula - Not my favorite
Simon - The song got away from you

Taylor sang Play that Funky Music - This was Taylor being Taylor. He reminded me why I love him. He had a good time. I love the funky, spastic dancing!
Randy - You had a good time
Paula - This is why people love you
Simon - It was like a horrible wedding performance

For their second round
Elliott sang Home - He does have a great voice but Elliott would be better for studio work (in my opinion. I don't think he is the AMERICAN IDOL.
Randy - Good choice
Paula - Showed off the richness of your voice
Simon - Bad choice of song lyrics (I want to go home). Ha Simon made a funny!

Paris sang Mary J. Blige Be Without You - I was worried but Paris can sing and did Mary proud!
Randy - Big risk! You rocked.
Paula - I love your voice
Simon - I think you did rather well

Chris sang I Dare You - I truly think this guy is the winner. If not we will be hearing a lot of him. He is MY American Idol.
Randy - Just all right for me
Paula -Not my favorite but I love you
Simon - Your voice is going but great song

Katherine sang Black Horse and The Cherry Tree - I loved that she started on the floor with the dudes on those drums things. 10 seconds in, I wanted her to get off the floor. I am not sure what she was going for there sexy, lazy, cute...love her but they have people to clean the floor.
Randy - That's the Kat I like - I guess Randy likes his women crawling all over the floor
Paula - Like the intimacy of the performance
Simon - Showed more personality

Taylor sang Something [in the Way] by the Beatles (huh - what were they doing in the top 10?). I love Taylor but his expressions crack me up. He is fun to me and doing this serious song was funny for me.
Randy - Great song
Paula - Move it tenderly
Simon - You are a very good singer. That was good.

If was voting:
Winner - Chris
To Go Home - Dare I say it...ok...Taylor.. Oh the shame. I love you Taylor but someone has to go.