Xbox Revisited.

Yesterday's Xbox time went well. When it was time to shut the box off Handsome totally complied after one "I don't want to." I told him that I knew he didn't want to but that the timer went off and unless he wanted me to unplug it he should make the right choice and turn it off.

He did.

We hugged and I thanked him for listening.

But....a few hours before that, we had a really bad moment.

After dealing with him not listening and not staying in time out yesterday I was really annoyed when he decided again not to listen to me. Right now I can't remember what he said, or what I has asked of him that made me say, "Again, you are not listening to me." Don't you remember yesterday? When he yelled back and hit at me. I took him to time out.

He yelled and said, "I don't want time out." I told him that I didn't care what he wanted and that Mommy had asked him to listen and he was to sit in time out until the timer went off.

He fought like a rabid dog and I fought just as hard. It was a street fight right in my hall way. Him fighting and scared and me trying to make my point that he would obey me, not talk back and listen to what I was telling.

We struggled and he wouldn't sit in time out, I kept putting him back and eventually he knew that fighting and talking wouldn't get him anywhere but man it was a battle.

When the timer rang I motioned to him and we walk towards each other. I told him that he was put in time out for not listening to me and hitting me. He was never to hit me again and that I was very sad.

He said, "Ok" while looking at me. Our eyes and heart touched and I started to tear. I don't make a habit of crying in front of my babies but I wanted him to see my emotion. I said, "I'm sad because we fight and we yell. I am sad because I love you and I don't like us to be mad at each other."

He was holding something, a little book and asked me what I thought it said. As he asked another tear fell down my cheek. He said, "I think it says, "to make you feel better mom." which made me tear up more.

I asked him if he knew why I was crying and he said, "because, because..."

My 2 year old came in and she said, "are you crying mom?"

I told her yes then asked my son again if he knew why I was crying. He again wiped my tear and said, "because".

I turned to my 2 year old baby girl and said, "do you know why Mommy is sad?"

She crossed her arms and then pointed very quickly to her brother and said, "because of Handsome."

The she said, "did he hurt your belly?"

I told her "no, he hurt my heart."

They both sat next to me wiping my tears and hugging me. Then my son said, "I love you my heart mom." Translation: I love you with all my heart. Which I usually follow with "I love YOU with all my heart too." To which he says, "you're welcome" followed by a hug.

Ahhhh kids. What you gonna do?

XBOX TANTRUMS

XBox made a big appearance in our home almost 2 months ago.

I brought it out of storage, dusted it off and got my 4 year old 2 games. We started with Munchie's Odysey which we had and then I found Zathura which is one of his favorite movies. After that we moved onto Charlie and The Chocolate Factory.

With some effort he has progressed pretty well with the games and we started using it as a reward for going to school which had become a problem for a few months.

I put him on a timer after 55 minutes to 2 hours depending on the day and inform him when I will be starting the timer and when the bell rings he is done. This worked for a while but now since he is getting more into the game it is taking a lot more coaxing to get him to shut the game off after the bell rings. He fights me the moment he hears me wind it and has started hitting at me.

Well, now he is 43.6 pounds and more than half my height. My son hitting me is a huge problem. For about 2 weeks I would work up the timer, when it rang I would ask him to shut it off, he would yell and rush at me, I would tell him it was ok I would do it and he would say that he would then he would turn it off, and cry in my lap for 2 minutes. Then I would tell him he was a big boy for shutting it and thank you for listening.

Yesterday I had to take the game away for the first time. Here's why...He went ballistic when the timer went off, hitting at me, rushing at me, pushing me, yelling at the top of his lungs, totally acting crazy.

I told him that if he didn't stop I would take the game away. He pushed and scream at me again so I walked over and unplugged it.

As I carried it to away looking for a place to put it he hit at my back. I finally put it in a cabinet and then he tried to climb it. I asked him to stop and he told me no. I told him that if he didn't stop hitting or yelling I would put him in time out. He didn't.

I put him in time out and he laughed for the first 10 minutes. Is he kidding me? Every time I placed him in the time out spot he walked away and acted like I was playing a game with him. I told him I wasn't happy and this wasn't funny.

Every time I walked away he was right behind me telling me he didn't want to. I told him I didn't care what he wanted but he was in time out until the timer rang. His speech therapist was waiting for him and was lucky enough to see the whole hour of time out. Why does a 4 minute timeout have to last 55 minutes?

As I put him in, he yelled, screamed and came out. I walked over to bring him back to time out and he hit me or yelled.

Wrestling my 4 year old for timeout seems ridiculous. I need to get his ass in gear soon. I was physically and mentally exhausted. Hopefully he will get his game back soon but last night was his first day not being able to play and he wasn't too happy.

I explained why he wasn't getting it. I told him that he had to listen to mommy and that he was never ever to hit me.

When I disciple I always have Jo "Supernanny" on my shoulder. I always wonder what would she say about what I am doing? What am I doing wrong? I never believe there are bad children I always believe there is bad parenting. It is time for me to take my parenting skills to the next level because this kid is only getting bigger and I can no longer carry him to time out.

Wordless Wednesday - My Future Tree Hugger

Dialogues with Handsome - The Penis Convo

Saturday morning my son was lying in my bed drinking his milk and I was getting dressed.

Handsome: Mom, do you have a penis?

Me: No, I don't have a penis.

Handsome: Do you want to go buy one at the store?

Me: No, sweetie. Mommy doesn't want to buy one at the store.

Handsome: Mom, you have a bagina?

Me: Yes.

Handsome: Daddy has a penis?

Me: Yes.

Handsome: Daddy and I have a penis.

Me: Yes.

Handsome: Mom, you don't want a penis?

Me: Yes, No, oh never mind. Honey drink your milk.

Geez...do we have to have a penis conversation every time he catches me getting dressed? I think it is time to go into the locked bathroom.

Manic Monday - explosive

The word yesterday at Its a blog eat blog world was explosive.

The first thing that came to mind was an explosive diaper story, but honestly I have had so many potty training posts in the past that I decided to just post pictures of explosions.

I researched pictures of explositions and decided they are too damn scary for my nice little Mommy Blog so in lieu of big scary, deadly explosions I am going to fake, scary, made for movie explositions compliments of Bruce Willis and The Die Hard Movies.


Enjoy!

Track The Mula

I was so excited this morning when I was cleaning out my pants pocket for the wash and found a $1.00 bill with a note on it. The note said, "please enter and track this bill at ____

I took a picture of the bill and sitting down with my coffee, the bill and a dream....uh cough, cough..., I got the kids settled with some juice and put on Dora the Explorer hoping for no interruptions.

My fingers typed wheresgeorge and waited for the site to come up. There was a login spot and I thought "geez, I don't want to start a friggin profile on another site" then I noticed the enter a bill prompt.

They ask for my zip code, the denomination, the series, the serial number then a place where you can describe the condition of the bill. The bottom of the screen tells me that the next screen will tell me where the bill has been, how many miles it had travelled and how long it has been circulating.

Cool! Where had it travelled to? Has it been across the state yet? I am so excited and almost call the kids over to explain it to them with a map of the United States of America spread out on the table.

Thank God I didn't go through the effort because basically the bill started out in Bloomfield, NJ about 45 minutes away from me. The Bloomfield location was the person who put the bill into circulation and they did that in November 2007.

This bill has travelled 29 Miles in 107 Days, 10 Hrs, 29 Mins at an average of 0.27 Miles per day. It is now 29 Miles from its starting location.

Well...at least I bothered. I guess my entering the damn bill will mean something to someone along the way.

Sledding Mosaic

Snow Day

Today was an awesome day. We got out there and enjoyed the snow and I got to burn about 800 calories walking with the kids, picking them up when they fell and sliding down the hill with my son.

Sliding on By

Waist Deep in Snow

Tuesday Toddler Tales

Writing about my kids is one of the easiest things to do.

There are so things to write about these two but I guess I will make this post specific to today.
This morning my son’s Special Instructor came over after not seeing him for 1 week and he was not interested in working with her. Pretty typical considering he hasn’t been with an instructor or school in over a week. So resourceful mom brought out a towel, two bowls of water, some bubbles, a hand mixer and we got some physical therapy in while getting him to finally open up to his therapist. Awesome! Mom 1 - kid 0.

Tonight while I was reading and blogging I heard Goddess in the kitchen talking to no one. When I asked her what she was doing she said playing with her animals. I walked in to find her entire book case of animals in a line on the floor of the kitchen. When I asked her what they were doing she said “smiling.” My heart hurts, she is too damn cute.

Yup…smiling. Sometimes it really is as simple as that.

Manic Monday - 2

I have 2 beautiful children. A boy (Handsome) and a girl (Goddess) who are my world.

My maternal instincts would love more than 2. I would love to have at least 1 more but 2 is the number my husband rooted for.

My Life has been so full of 2’s

2 pets no longer with me

2 parents who sheltered and fed me

2 sisters who couldn’t be more different

2 best friends, who says you can only have 1?

2 nephews who I don’t see enough of

2 eyes to see my children

2 ears to hear their voices

2 arms to hold them tight

2 legs to carry them to bed at night

2 hands to hold theirs as we walk to the park.

Funny, I used to think 5 was my favorite number but it can’t be ignored that 2 shoves those reasons right out the door.

Logging Food Makes You Full

So yesterday I wrote about going back to SparkPeople and trying to stick with the whole thing.
I logged my food yesterday and came up about 200 calories short for the day.

Today my lunch put me over the top. It wasn’t a big lunch by any means but it was pizza and according to Sparkpeople my 2 slices of pepperoni pizza bring me 200 calories over the recommended allowance.

The pizza was homemade and the calories logged on Spark are for 2 slices of pepperoni pizza period. I am not sure if that means from a greasy pizzeria or if that means making your own pizza with your own flour, yeast, water, sugar, salt, sauce and pepperoni or perhaps it’s the same thing. Whatever, if I look at the numbers, I am in fact, done for the day.

So no dinner for me! Thankfully we were doing whatever night which basically means I throw two choices to the kids and they get to choose. The girl requested cereal and the boy asked for a bagel and cheese. Easy as pie. I was only going to have Special K tonight anyway.

Thankfully the Valentines candy is almost gone and if I didn’t have a migraine today (which nothing was helping) I was going to go on the treadmill. Hopefully tomorrow that will happen.

I will have a cup of tea about 7:00 p.m. and try to get another 2 glasses of water in before I turn in for the night. So far I have had 3 glasses of water maybe that is why I am full.

No sense worrying about the 864 calorie lunch now tomorrow is another day.

A Valentines Work Of Art

I love that Handsome is writing.

He taught himself back in April of last year when he showed me a “W” that he had written on a Magna Doodle. Over the year he taught himself to write many words. Lately he writes XBox and Charlie (from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) and a few months ago it was Spy Kids along with all his other words (his name, blue, dog, cat, bird, bat, etc).

This year for Valentines day we made a heart for Daddy and then he wrote “I love you Daddy” with a little picture that he said was Daddy. Ummm..looks nothing like him but if he says so.

For Valentines Breakfast I made a Pancake Puppy. The kids loved the idea but eat everything but the red pancake. Why do I bother? Oh yeah, I remember, because I am trying to make memories.

Weighing In

Back in July I joined a great site called Spark People. I loved it and checked in daily for the first 2 weeks. Then the summer got away from me, school started, Christmas shopping, my son’s anxiety about leaving me that came out of left field, tons of crap and before you know it we are in February.

Ummm…was it really July that I was there last?

Anyway I signed in again today and started logging my food for the day (One of the best features about the site as far as I am concerned) when it dawned on me how little I pay attention to my food intake. I love that this site makes me accountable for what I eat. Also, that I am not drinking enough water which is something I used to be able to do before kids. I always have a glass of water near me and although this is a good thing, my kids drink all my water. So although I am filling 6 glasses a day I drink about 2.

Another thing is that I eat what the kids don’t. Like the sausage I made this morning (not a big enough breakfast I know) for them which they left 1 each on their plates, I ate. I didn’t even like it. It was cold and taste greasy.

Then my daughter asked for these organic cookies from Earth’s Best but ate only 2 of them. I ate the rest of the serving size. I didn’t even want them.

I am going to start writing about my progress on this blog because I want to hold myself more accountable for what I eat.

My goal is to live healthier, be more active (summer is coming and we are always more active in the summer), drink MY water, and eat more live food which inevitably will help me lose weight which is never my first goal.

I had an eating disorder for many years and try not to make my weight an issue. I try not to make my weight ever be about a particular number.

Also, I try not to let anyone’s comments (cough cough my husband), affect my thoughts on myself. Which to be honest has gotten easier over the years. Say what you will, I do not care! Not that he comes right out and makes inappropriate comments about gasp a women’s weight but there have been some insensitive comments that I will never be able to forget.

As for SparkPeople’s other great features check out the fitness section where they provide you with a easy, exercise plan that you can do right next to your desk if you need to.

If you join Spark please let me know I would love to have some friends on there.

Here’s to getting healthy, living longer and buying off the rack!

Last Valentines Day

I love how they lie together reading.

It's amazing that this picture was taken 1 year ago on February 14, 2007 when I feel like it was just yesterday.

Manic Monday - Heart

The word heart makes me think of Valentines Day. I see beautiful pink and red hearts not veiny, pumping hearts.

When I doodle I tend to draw hearts. I always wondered what that says about me. Let’s look it up now. Well according to this site, it means I am a sentimentalist. Ok, I’ll take that.

Taking care of your heart means more than eating right to me.

According to this site these are the top 25 Heart healthy foods.

Taking care of your heart means:

Surrounding yourself with people who love you and you love back.
Surrounding yourself with things you love.
Being the best you that you can be.
Loving yourself.
Continuing your knowledge.
Seeing each day for the beautiful gift it is.

One of the most important things I want to tell my daughter is, “marry someone who takes care of your heart. Someone who knows you, cares for your feelings, soothes your concerns, acknowledges your accomplishments and loves you with every ounce of their own heart. Someone who will think before they speak.”

My heart was hurt today and that is because I live with someone who has no idea how to take care of my heart.

Potty Training Is Done and Yes I will Take A Bow

Potty training the Goddess has been done for a week.

There has been no accidents during the day or at night and we have been diaper-less for three weeks now. I can’t believe it!

I know I said this when I was potty training Handsome but, man that was easy. Handsome took 2 months from beginning to end but only 2 weeks of actual training.

Goddess has been an interesting subject to say the least. She started on her own when she was 1.5 years old but since she was so little I let her lead. If she wanted to we did and if not we let it go. There was also the smart poop story where she tried to get over on me for a treat.

We went out and let her pick out new underwear (about $25.00 worth)the other day and we are working on her wiping herself which is a problem for her. Not that she doesn’t try but she really is an itty bitty so pulling to toilet paper and trying to wipe while holding up her shirt with her pants around her ankles just isn’t easy for her.

BTW I am really going to miss her little Morticia Adams walk as we head back to the bathroom to wash up. I hold her hand and watch her little feet take little steps with her bare little cute bottom and in a weird way know I will miss this one day. One day when no one needs me to wipe their butt or walk them by the hand back to the bathroom, hold them up to wash their hands or to cheer because they went on the potty. Knowing me it will probably be tomorrow.

Potty training requires patience, love, but most importantly a sense of humor.

There is not way and what works for 1 kid will not work for the next. You have to know your kid and when they are ready. I have a few friends who are going on a year of training and I think it is because a lot of people just want to be done with the diapers and some also believe that beginning to potty training starts at a particular age. This is not true and I now believe if you begin potty training before a child is really ready you will eventually have them trained but end up with night time problems or a lot of accidents.

My advice is this:

Get a potty chair and put it in the living room.

In the morning while the kid is watching Sesame Street or whatever give them their sippy or bottle and if they happen to go on the potty celebrate, if not forget it and move on with the day.

Know your kid - if reward work use them. Whether it is a food treat, or time with mom…use it.

Good luck and keep your sense of humor. You will need it!

First Play-Date Was A Success

Two weeks ago, someone I know, “Nurse” asked if I was interested in doing a play-date with our boys. We live on the same street and talk occasionally. Our boys are about 6 months apart in age with her boy, let’s call him Rush for story sake, being the older one. She also has a 2.5 year boy, let’s call him Linebacker because he is just such a big boy.

Nurse sent Rush to me for an hour on that first play-date because her little one wasn’t feeling well. I really wasn’t sure if the play-date should happen because if Linebacker was sick whats to say that Rush wasn’t infected and would pass something hideous onto mine? Being able to say “no” has never been one of my strong points.

Anyway back to the story, Rush was like any other kid when they first get to someones house. He played with everything and then focused on one thing. Occasionally the kids all played together but mostly that was when they were racing each other up and down my hall. After that it became a Rush and Goddess play-date. Handsome wasn’t interest about 1/2 way in.
Goddess and Rush had a good time and Nurse was awesome in picking up her son within the hour just like she said.

I was thrilled that she had suggested it and disappointed that my son wasn’t more eager to participate with Rush. We thought that perhaps he would have a better play-date at Rush’s house next time and vowed to do it again next week.

I have mentioned that I feel he has a deficiancy in social skills and that the way he plays with his sister is how I would love to see him with his peers.

Last week, I told her we were hibernating when she called to see if we were going to still have the play-date. School was closed because of the ice storm and I didn’t want to go out and really sending my son out without me for the first time was not something I was eager to do.

This morning while he was having a session with his Special Education Instructor there was a loud bang on my door. Then more banging. I looked out the window to see if FedEx or UPS was over zealous or something but saw Nurse and Linebacker running up my drive way.

It was Rush banging on the door and so excited to have his best “what’s your name again” friend come over.

Handsome hadn’t been told about this play-date and had not idea why I was dressing him so quickly. I put his shoes on him, told him he was going to play at Rush and Linebacker’s house and to stay near Nurse and have fun. He left without a look back, running down the street, holding Nurse’s hand while her two ran ahead. Considering our abandonment issue from a few months ago this is a step in the right direction.

I called her about 15 minutes into the play-date telling her this was my first time sending him out alone and that I would try not to call again but would pick him up in an hour. She mentioned that he was “so good” “a pleasure” “welcomed anytime” and that he was playing with both boys.

Goddess and I walked down there wheeling her little stuffed pig and a bear in her doll carriage. I could hear him laughing from about 15 feet away. They were outside enjoying the day and having a blast. He was being pushed on a swing by Nurse and saw me, “Look, there’s mom.”
He got off the swing and come over. “Mom I’m having fun.”

Nurse filled me in on the rest of the play-date which was him running back and forth, telling her “I’m going to check on Rush or I’m going to check on Linebacker. Bye” She also told me that he tries to keep the boys out of trouble. If he noticed them doing something they shouldn’t do, he’d say,”Oh, Rush, that’s dangerous, be care.”

Honestly I had figured Nurse would call and I would have some other reason not to send him out. I am so glad she just showed up because he had an awesome time and we made plans to try to get them together every week which will be good for all of them and eventually me.

Catching Up On Manic Monday-Blue is the Word

This feels like an elementary school assignment on what I like about the color blue.

Blue is my favorite color. I don’t have a favorite blue. I like all blue colors. Blue was my mom’s favorite color and the color of her eyes. My sister’s and I unfortunately didn’t get blue eyes but I love the color of them anyway.

One of the best features of my terrifically awesome camera is the color features. You can make the picture black and white and chose one color to stand out. I chose blue 80% of the time.

Over the summer I took some awesome pictures of my husband’s blue jeans against the black and white background. He looked hot as hell and the blue jeans rocked. I won’t post the blue jean picture but well that is just too much hotness for my little ole’ blog.

Fill-In

I blog-hogged (phrase I stole from Bek) twice in this post. Snagged this little Fill-In from Jaime

1. The last compliment I got was from Bek; she said in an email, that she liked me hair cut.
2. I’m reading Slash
3. I woke up today and thought it’s morning already?
4. Why does everyone in this house think I should jump when they ask me for something?
5. The last thing I ate was t-bone steak that Teach surprised me with when he went grocery shopping this evening.
6. January… Was last month
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to Getting the kids to bed and relaxing in front of a tv, falling asleep whenever it happens.
Tomorrow my plans include keeping the kids out of the way so the Teach can enjoy his team win the Superbowl.
Sunday, I want to Catch up on backing up my pictures.

Self Portrait - Celebrate - Cutting off 2 Pounds of Hair

Randomness

1. soda or water?
Ah, I love my water. I used to drink so much more but now my kids drink all my water. I know this isn’t a bad thing for them but it really sucks for me. My kids have yet to have soda including the 4 year old. My daughter does like seltzer though.

2. mustard or ketchup? It depends on the food. Certain condiments go with certain foods.


3. lake or beach? Since a pool isn’t an option I choose lake. We spent the whole summer at our lake last year and I can’t wait to do it again this year.


4. rent a dvd or go to the theater? The last time I was at a theater was 2003. It was to see the Pirates of the Caribbean but I was a nursing mom of a newborn and well it was dark, someone was watching the baby, the seat was comfy. I did what any new mom would do. I slept.


5. log onto the Internet or go for a jog? I truly wish I could say I would go for a jog buuuuttttt….


6. read a book or watch a movie? I love both. Sitting down to a book is wonderful. Watching a movie with someone is wonderful. Depends on whether I have company or not.


7. Italian food or Chinese food? That is really hard. I love both but I think I could eat Italian food daily. One day of Chinese and I feel like I need to stay away from it for a month or more.


8. summer or winter? The old me, prior to last summer would have said winter. I hate being hot but last year rocked. My kids and I spent an awesome time at the lake during the week and on the weekend my husband came along. It was everything I hoped family time would be so Summer all the way.


till next time…