Yesterday, I set the kids up to do some crafts at the table. I went over for the occasional request (draw this, write this, glue this) but mostly they did their own thing. This happens about 4 time a week in this house but this day was different.
As I did my 100th flyby I noticed something on the floor under the table.
I said, What is that?
Goddess said, Nothing.
So, I reach under to pick it up and see that it is hair. Her hair! Goddess' hair! Her very first hair cut was done by herself??????
As I collect all the pieces of hair I notice that my son is still coloring and Goddess about to go into her blanket, "I'm just sorry" mode.
With all the pieces (3 small sections) clutched in my hand I remove her from her chair, remove the scissors from her hand, give her a tap on her butt and walk her to her room. Noticing that she is about to cry (insulted, scared, embarrassed, or otherwise I see the card I have to play).
I squat down and say, I am very sad. Now, I can't trust you with scissors. This makes me very sad. I stand and walk out of her room.
In true Goddess fashion (I knew this name would fit her when I started using when she was 3 months old) she quietly shut the door behind me.
Standing in the bathroom I look at myself in the mirror as I wait to go back into her room. I am so sad. Why? Maybe it is because this was her first haircut. Maybe it is because I left her alone for 2 seconds. Maybe she wants short hair and I am holding her back, was she making a statement?. Or maybe it is because I am mush when it comes to my kids and her cutting her beautiful hair reminds me of all the terrible haircuts that my grandmother gave me when I was little. Whatever it is, I have humungo tears in my eyes as I knock on her door and walk back into her room. (I know, I knocked on a 3 year old's door. I have been doing this since they were babies. They deserve their privacy and I want to respect that too) She is standing there where I left her trying to hid behind her Princess couch and looks at me.
Getting on my knees I put my hands on her shoulders.
I tell her to look at my eyes. She does.
As she glances at me, I allow a tear to roll down my face (I really should have been a damn actress), and say...I am so sad that you cut your hair. You had scissors close to your face and you could have hurt yourself. Mommy cannot let you do cutting unless I sit with you from now on. You can go color if you want. I hug her and leave.
Standing at the sink about to wash the glass in there she walks over to me.
I look down and she says, I am just so very sorry Mommy.
Giving her a pat on her head I say, I know you are.
She goes back to the table to color.
The whole time her brother has been sitting at the table coloring. As his father comes up the stairs, he runs over and says, "Daddy, Goddess cut her hair."
Giving my husband the envelope with her hair and the cut sign across my throat I tell him I would like to talk to him inside.
She is 3 and since we already talked about it I didn't want her to hear me talking about it with anyone else.
The moral of the story is, kids can't be trusted with scissors even if you have trusted them for months and even when it appears that one child is oblivious, they are taking in the whole thing.
Oh and another thing....no reason to go ape shit and yell at a child when they do something wrong....just get very serious and freak the hell out of them. If I had gone into freak out mode she would have felt defensive.
She will not be doing this anytime soon. How do I know?
6 hours later while cleaning up the toys I asked her to please stop throwing things.
Her response, "ok...I don't want you to be mad and sad like before."
Yes! 1 for mom 0 for kid