Recently I was contacted by two "friends" so I could hear their side of the story. This wouldn't be a problem if we were friends like that! I know them but don't REALLY know them. Our kids are in the same school but we aren't involved in each other's life. They don't know anything about me but I know everything about them.
The recent drama is all the more dramatic because there is an innocent child involved. Why do people search for drama? Isn't life heard enough without the added pursuit of searching for drama? Why can't people just grow up? Why do people feel that they can't just breathe through the day, listen to the world around them and be OK with just being by themselves?
These two young people, who are parents of a young child, ended a very volatile relationship just this August, after 7 years of drama. Here we are, only 2 months later, and they are both involved in additional, separate but together drama.
From the outside, everyone can see what has to be done. They both need counseling. They both need therapy and of course so will their beautiful little one. They need to both find peace with being alone and not engaging in additional toxic relationships. They need to find comfort in themselves and the quietness of life. Everything doesn't need to always be so fast, loud, moving. They need to learn that it is OK to just be!
Hopefully they will both realize their faults and their priority, who unfortunately has no say in what is going on in their life. However, my fear is that they will never see it and their poor child will turn out just like them or worse.
As I listen to them and want to help, I am wise enough to know that if I allow their drama into my life, I am inviting chaos into mine. That is not OK and I need to constantly check myself and remind myself that we become the company we keep something I have been telling both of them.
So while I will listen and advise, I know that people will do what they do and it is not my problem.
Peace out!
Good for you. These two seriously need help. Do they not see what they're teaching their child. Now they're beautiful baby will settle in the same bad poison when they are old enough.
ReplyDeleteI'd stay as far as possible from them, without affecting your own children. Since they school together you must stay cordial, but at arm's length.
Good luck with them chick.
Please don't get involved!! Give your advice but stay away as much as possible. I know is hard when there is a child involve, but the less you know the better it is.
ReplyDeleteIt's easier to have drama that to work out problems to find a solution that's good for everybody. I feel sorry for the child, but hopefully the child will grow up and see what a bad example the family has set and choose to rise above that silliness. My sister and I managed it, so it can be done! And if you try to help someone that really doesn't want help or won't help themselves, you will just become the next victim of the drama, so you are right to stay out of it as much as possible!
ReplyDeleteYou're smart. Best not to get in the middle. I almost let myself get drawn into anothers' drama once, but thankfully realized in time that no good would come from it. So I had to disconnect myself from that person or I help I would get toxic like them. Thing was after I disconnected with them they started all the nonsense talking with others and started bad mouthing me too. Well, I just let it go. Just proves it was best that I did what I did.
ReplyDeleteI should have known better because I had to disconnect from a relative earlier in my life that wanted unhealthy drama all the time.
Twice burned and hopefully so smart now that I'll never travel down that road again.