My Readers Are The Best, Thanks For Listening

I tried to comment back to my wonderful readers this morning but my comments were wayyy to long! They require a whole post of their own.

My comments from this post to my readers.

Freda, Thanks honey. I struggled with putting this up but after seeing the nonsense I just couldn't hold back and did it in a forum that none of our hometown friends would see. On Facebook, we have 15 mutual friends and word spreads fast. I even had a mom ask me if she was talking about me on Facebook! Losses are cut! Believe me, there comes a point when you refuse to be abused and finally stand up for yourself. I am a nice person but ever since the first two times we have had problems, this person was held at arms length. Momma didn't raise no fool. I am nice and give people the benefit of the doubt but this was getting just down right mean. She has been erased.

Clary, Hopefully this person means what she said and learns from these people. You are right though when you say "they are not allowed back in", there is only so much verbal abuse someone should allow themselves. Everyone has their breaking point. Me and this friend did everything to make sure this persons feeling were never hurt. We worried about her and her family. We called to see if she was OK, if we didn't call, we didn't hear from her. The friendship was very one sided and my friend and I have zero guilt for where it is right now. Our conscience is clear. We knew we didn't do anything wrong and that this persons interpretation of this is clouded. We knew we could end up here because she NEVER likes anyone, has something nasty to say about everybody and has kicked friends from her life before. Lesson learned. First impressions are always correct!

Sarah, Exactly and when it is family it is even harder. I have a sister who I cut out of my life for less bs than this. My sister is family and if she needed me one day, I would be there. I just don't go looking for her. Her negativity and darkness keep me far away because she has messed with my head one too many times. There are people who will always choose darkness. Always be miserable, they bred drama and negativity. You can't help them but you can be there for them when they need you. Unfortunately, this person has kicked me too many times. I would be a fool to let this continue or let this back into my life.

Bloomerbear, this is exactly how I feel. The girlfriend I referred to in this post was concerned that our names are being dragged through the mud. That this is a small town and knowing this person, we know she will talk about us to everyone. I however, know that our TRUE friends will know us enough to listen to the BS, nod when she talks but know that she is full of it. I am not worried and anyone who chooses to follow her, was never our friend in the beginning and they will (if they get close enough) end up where we are too! It is who she is.

Hollow, Exactly! This is so true. She would have done the same. My girlfriend in this post who I refer to had a communion for her daughter, it was in the city. For whatever reason, I didn't get there. She also knows I have never driven to the city and I have no way to get there otherwise. It is a driving phobia of mine. She has the same one. She wanted me there but knew and stated, it's in the city, I know you won't come. Everything in me wanted to be there it didn't happen. I love this girl, her family and her daughter yet I wasn't there for a very important day. She never held it over my head. She missed me there. I wanted to be there but we have a mutual understanding and know as friends, the other would never intentionally hurt us. I totally agree. My daughter and I had the best time. I know I made the right choice and my own sister understood, (we will do all the summer birthdays together at my families house next month) even if I had gone to this baby shower, something else would have come up. Plus, how can you expect people to cancel plans, go out of their way, when you have been rude, distant and nasty over the past few months/years?

I agree about Facebook! It should never have been there. This shows you the kind of person I am dealing with. She had plenty of time to leave horrible messages on our walls or in posts but didn't have the time to call us as a friend to say how upset she was we weren't there. We really figured she would understand and knew us enough to know that we would be doing something for her baby and her. Oh well, she just saved me money and time.

It's funny because another friend had a baby shower last month, I was at a birthday party (another for my daughters friend), I could have made it but would have been 45 minutes late. It was only 18 minutes away and I still didn't get there. She didn't hold it against me. She understand. Family IS first. Most people understand this, some people (especially those with bad family turmoil) will never.

Thanks you guys for listening. Talking it out even if it is in written form reiterates what I already knew. This is all for the best!