My Son Holds My Heart In His Hands

I don't know another kid who tries as hard as he does to fit into our world. He is completely unaware that he is any different from anyone else. He just knows he is always either in trouble or praised. I can only imagine how confusing his day to day can be sometimes. The world can be cruel to kids like my son. He thinks differently and that is not his fault. It is who he is and I wouldn't have him any other way. As a spectrum kid he is constantly under the microscope for everything sometimes too much in my opinion. I feel there are a ton of mainstream kids that could use the services he thankfully receives.

My son sees things very literally which means influencing, predictions, figures of speech and thinking outside the box are very hard for him.  He knows what he can see. He has come a long way since his early intervention days which makes me a huge supporter of Early Intervention especially if done right.

I started him a month away from his 3rd birthday. Knowing what I know now there are many things I would have changed especially certain therapists I would have had removed and switched. I can't go back but I know that starting his was the right thing to do.

My son is now 12 and one of the best people I know. He makes my heart sing. When he says something you know he feels and means it.  Even writing this I am tearing with the amount of love I have for this boy.

Currently he gets speech, occupational therapy and group and solo counseling for anger control. He is not an angry boy by nature but his inability to fully understand a situations frustrates him. However this kid knows how to calm himself down and when he does, especially if given the proper amount of time to do so he will come around, apologize with his whole heart and beg you to forgive him.

This is something I am constantly saying to my daughter who will never forgive him even though he should be asking for her forgiveness for the things she says and does to him. At 10 she doesn't understand no matter how many times I tell her that the world is hard enough on him and he deserves a break at home.  I must have explained to her that getting apologies from anyone is not something that occurs often and that when he says it, he truly means it.

Now if I can get the rest of the world to see how amazing this kid all will be well in my life.  My heart breaks for him. He wants friends and doesn't have any real ones. Thankfully he is a loving boy who knows his family loves him. He loves hugs and has no problem cheering for someone else. I can only pray that one the his peers see what an amazing friend he can be if they allow him in.

Handsome, if you ever read this...your mommy is so very proud of you and how you handle every situation in your life. You make me smile every day. I love you so much!